Incoherence…

A blocked feeling that looks like the place.

There are places that you cannot get used to no matter how often you visit …or you’re forced to visit.

The ministry of interior is one of them.

It is any official\governmental office, and no one wins over the worse feeling that imposes on me.

Today I had this unpleasant forced visit to that bad place.

What should I say … how could I describe?

It is one of those times where what you feel and what you see can unite.

Both as bad as it gets.

The squishing of the metal gate with a full metal entry that reminds you of a prison, a checkpoint, a ghetto… two lanes one for men and one for women, surveillance cameras with notes saying that you are under supervision of cameras after every few meters.

Waiting for the unknown is the title of the situation

Maybe it is not the unknown.

The unknown could be a pleasant outcome.

This has nothing pleasant

It is just waiting

Waiting for the mercy of a soldier to give you order in Hebrew to pass.

Waiting

While filth surrounds you

And stirring looks of people losing their patience mount

Women start nagging each other

A fight erupts

A smile broadens my face

Thinking.

Yes some entertainment while waiting

The smile shamefully shrinks back

Silence again

Women fighting again

Men interfering giving advises

Insults

The woman with the hijab is the woman of virtue

The woman without the hijab is the slut

A man interferes again

“Calm down ladies.”

The soldier gives the order to another to pass.

It’s my turn

No, my turn

The soldier gives order with impartial distaste

Pass

Another checkpoint

A machine

Enter

Go back

Enter

Go back

Take this side

Turn

Left right

Turn again

Your shoes off

Your belt out

Your glasses

Your socks

Your headband

Your watch, ring, bracelet, earring

You are ringing

Take her inside and body search

A machine buzzes with no stop

It is a human sensitive machine

Anything makes it buzz

Pass

Another line

Waiting

Same crew reunion

Hebrew words

I don’t understand Hebrew

Who cares, Hebrew words

What does it mean?

Just take a number

Anywhere

Go left

No, go right

You know

No, go there

Just wait in line

Waiting

Surveillance cameras around you

Surround you

Sit

Stand

Don’t go there

Stop here

Wait

Wait

Wait

Wait

A voice there: just register my son

Another view: I brought you all the papers you requested

Another: I swear he lives here

Voices of stories begging

Crying

Praying

Voices mixed with humiliation

Arabic in Hebrew dialect

Or Hebrew in Arabic dialect

I cannot grasp any of that anymore

Too loud

Too suffocating

The cameras warn me that they are around

My turn

Missing paper, missing photo, missing application

How do I know?

I don’t know

You should know

Who should be aware?

I don’t know

Someone should know

I don’t know, missing papers…

Left

Swearing, mumbling, never to come back again

Beautiful olive tree that must have been stolen from our other land

Bids me goodbye

See you soon she tells me.


2 thoughts on “Incoherence of Incoherence of being Occupied
  1. Utterly and amazingly terrifying …

    Like

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