Sabra and Shatilla and the Palestinian Exodus

We are marking another date in the Palestinian Exodus; Sabra and Shatila Massacre in Lebanon in 1982 under the auspices of Ariel Sharon. It was among the marking massacres of cruelty and viciousness of a cold-blooded occupation. As years scroll by, the assumed numbers that amounted to thousands of victims in that killing, seem just another chapter in the exodus of the Palestinian people.

As if we are destined just to commemorate miseries of out own life that continue to bring on us worse miseries to add to our mess.

I am not yet sure if what is happening in these years in its exposure is a result of the outspread of social media or is it just increasing? As we insist not to forget the miseries of the past, our present is haunting us with its massive makings.

Whatever is happening in the Aqsa and the old city of Jerusalem is as disturbing and threatening as a single act of terror Israel performs everytime and then. I don’t know how much of a coincidence is the name of Sharon related to the massive threat in Jerusalem. It was Sharon’s provocations that ignited an intifada in September 2000, when he attempted to “pray” in the Aqsa.

If one tries to rationalize his attempt to invade al-Aqsa that resulted in a massacre whose victims were in tens, a resemblance that kept also haunting the Palestinian minds, in a threat that in many ways exceed that of stealing a homeland. Al Aqsa remains a place that reflects deeply in that spiritual place of a Muslim mind, and a Palestinian heart. It is like watching the rape of your daughter.

Each year, in September, and marking the Jewish New Year, the same eruption of clashes seems just to escalate. Sometimes try to rationalize with the idea … thinking maybe these people are genuine people of faith that seriously guide them to some contemplation in this very same place. But then I think. Contemplation. It doesn’t work with force, with guns, with armed security forces, with aggressive provocations.

I try to think sometimes that we are exaggerating in our fear and then I look at our history, our commemorating moments of the past that refuses to redeem. A massacre after another all under the name of a myth called “people without a land to the land without people.”

Each passing day in this life under occupation is only a living prove that the Israeli aspiration is to make this land from its inhabitants to fulfill its created myth on this land.

As I see our mess as people. As a nation. I also tend to allow myself to think. Maybe we deserve this. Israel at the end is not the only guilty part. It is not Israel having a free access on our continued exodus of massacres. It has always been under the blinking eyes or serving hands of other powers … including that of our own. And as the situation only continues to deteriorate, it is we, Palestinians within our leadership to be blamed. I reached a level where I would not even try to raise a word asking the world to look and condemn to the least. Because sadly, I cannot ignore the deterioration in horizons and strategy and above all commitment to this land or us people from the current leadership.

A problem of Palestinians that continue to be…. Corrupt and fractioned leadership.

As the situation in al-Aqsa and Jerusalem continues to lay brutality and viciousness of fanatic groups, I have been thinking to go to the mosque. I was quickly taken aback by the thought knowing that I will not be allowed to enter. I was thinking about my non-religious looks that always invited the soldiers and the security on the gates to stop me. My covered self never tricked the people walking in the mosque yards from stopping me to ask if I was a Muslim. I thought if I made it inside the checkpoint that is created now, could I make it inside the mosque among my people. Within this mess, I was feeling it may be a time of reconciliation between how we look and how they want us to look like Muslims. My thoughts stopped as I watched more photos of the violations that are taking place in that area.

Fanatic occupation and fanatic people sabotage us. I sadly believe, that our path to liberation is still a long way … a long way for us Palestinians to rebuild the Palestinian that has been fractioned into shattered pieces inside us.


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