I am not sure if this is a curse, Karma, or just a natural consequence of what is happening.

I just finished writing about Ahmad Manasra to hear that two 12-13 years old boys from Shufat (next door neighborhood) tried to stab an Israeli in the soft train.

It is not hard to imagine the scene. As much as it is not hard to imagine what happened next.

But seeing it all taped is much harder than the imagination in this case. Somehow our imagination fantasizes or demonizing what usually happens. And suddenly the videos show for what is really was, and a confrontation with our rationality needs to take place… but yet we decide to keep taking sides.

I will still take side to my side. At the end I refuse to look into this conflict on an equal level. Because we are in a situation of inequality.

The incident of the stabbing of yesterday went viral. The scenes of two kids being lynched felt so sad, frustrating and only provoked my rage and devastation.

I felt that what I wrote was like a curse, as if I predicted it all. It was definitely a situation that didn’t need any prediction. Everything is so obvious; one can see it through clearly.

I woke up this morning on video of the attack itself, how it all happened. I was watching it with my mouth opened. Feeling the same striking shock I had when I watched that young woman attempting to stab the security in front of the settlement. But here, it felt heartburning. It was a scene with children. No matter how my imagination wants to demonize or justify, seeing children in all this is harsh and brutal. It is a situation where everyone is involved with no exception.

But then I was watching this, and I was imagining CHUCKY, the killer doll. These two boys were just sitting in the train when they ran over the man (I guess he was security) and tried to stab him. Maybe the human part here was an exceptional one for what we have been seeing in the last weeks. There was a very much of human intervention. The man tried to get them away. He was trying to defend himself. He was easily overpowering them, and when he drew out his weapon he was in control.

This is the scene that should always take place.

But what took place later from lynching, was a result of a complete rage, that I cannot not justify after seeing the before video. But yet here comes the intersecting twist. The fear and rage that took over the security people on these kids later was a totally demonizing one.

Yes, it is true that I imagined Chucky in the act. But these kids are not chucky. They didn’t do it for the sake of killing. They definitely watched the day before video of Manasra, who maybe was their schoolmate. Or to be more accurate, the whole concept of killing or violence is not a natural occurrence within them, but with no doubt a reaction of the current affair in this situation.

It is easy to call out and suggest solutions. It is easy to say that Israeli use of excessive violence should stop. The Israeli discrimination within every single aspect against Palestinians should stop. It is easy to call for Palestinian mothers and teachers and tell them stop educating violence. But this is not the case. This call is a call for a way of living within this society for the two people.

The state of terror that is surrounding us is horrific, and yet unavoidable … except if Israel changes its attitude towards how it perceives Palestinians.

Discrimination cannot be a persistent tool of coexistence. I refuse usually to use the term coexistence for this reason, because it doesn’t necessarily mean equality. We deserve equality. We deserve justice. We deserve to live normally.

This whole state of “suicide” attempts seems contagious. Sometimes I think one day this will be called the “Palestinian stabbing suicide” era. Since the “leaking” of the video of the interrogation, the question of why wasn’t leaked didn’t leave my mind. Between the idea that it could have been leaked to show the Israeli public that the interrogation was not violent after all. They didn’t hit the boy, despite what goes on in interrogation. And of course in the audience mind such interrogations might take them only to Guantanamo.

And then there is this analysis that they released to scare Palestinians. Some may have been scared. It was we adults who were scared. But for those in the same age group like Ahmad. The result was that they tried to copycat the act.

While thinking within this cycle of violence. A terror produces terror. A call for calming down in a way. I started to put myself in the Israeli eye. What should they do in front of life threatening provocations?

I was looking through my window, thinking that peace must come day, when we all become more tolerant. A remote scene appeared in front of me, with students walking covering their faces to smell tear gas sneaking inside my room.

But no one is there I thought.

It seemed like a normal day. No demonstrations. But yet, the tear gas was firing like clouds of fireworks from behind the wall.

Who is provoking whom I kept thinking…?

There is a state of blindness within the society, each against the other.

There is a state of insisting on maintaining violence within the Israeli forces.

There is a state of absence from the Palestinian authority.

We are living inside a reality that we people transformed ourselves to Zombies…

From Chucky , to King Kong. One day Zombies will be our destiny … All eating one another…

Our reality is ending to be worse than our imagination.


3 thoughts on “Our reality ; between demonizing and justifying .. remains worse than imagination

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