In the Shadows of Men : Road Map

ROAD MAP When I left my husband, I took with me a map that I drew carefully and modestly. The most important thing was that I would never again rely on a man. I had to remember that the greatest gain from the divorce was getting away, unlocking those chains and freeing myself from the […]


شراستي في العشق تبددت في غمرة الإحباطات الغامرة . فكم من معشوق اضمحل وتحول أمامي من فيل إلى فأر تشاكسه في أحسن أحواله قطة ‫

In the Shadows of men (excerpt)

It’s difficult revisiting those memories. A friend who worked for the organization told me, “Write down what happened and circulate it.” I was active in the Coalition of Women for Peace back then. Sending the message I wrote after that dark, hollow night gave me a sense of liberation. Writing had empowered me. The image […]

In the Shadows of Men(excerpt)

I started to walk when I was very little, my mother always told me. As a continuous warning, my grandfather would tie a rope around my ankle and tie the other end to a black iron rod planted deeply in the ground. I still remember the rod’s shape and size. For some reason, the memory […]

In the Shadows of Men (excerpt)

My grandfather was tough. Everyone in the family feared him, but I was his favorite. He protected me from the tyranny of my mother and the beatings of my grandmother and the teasing of my aunt. He preferred me to my cousin (or so I imagined), the first grandson, who was the eldest and, of […]

#In the Shadows of Men

Love without adoration is like a matchstick. It ignites but does not give warmth, and if its spark is not put to a fuse or a candle, it extinguishes and has no use. The rush of love, the flurry of the heart, the fumbling to be perfect… this is our experience in love. Therefore it […]

#In the Shadows of Men

How many times did I feel the ravages of divorce and its painful flaming burns? How often have I thought that marriage under the shadow of one man is more merciful? And yet, inhaling the air of freedom is different. Feeling that I’d been freed from the prison I used to share with him was, […]

في ظلال الرجال#

جعلني الطلاق أرى البيوت من شبابيكها . وكم مختلف المشهد. كم يختلف المشهد عن ذلك الذي تراه عندما تنظر من الباب. كم نحيا داخل بيوتنا في إطارات كاذبة مزدوجة واهية . وكم نتصرف بازدواجية مضادة وواقع سقيم وحقيقة كاذبة في لحظة إغلاق الباب وانفرادنا وذواتنا. وعائلاتنا. رؤيتي لعالم الرجال جعلني أشعر بأن مأساتي وزواجي كانت […]

#In the shadows of Men

I worked in the years of my marriage to draw a family painting with lines I drew in articulate details and attention until I started seeing it hanging infront of me professionally adding to my life an ascetic sense of beauty like valuable belongings and collectibles that are followed by fans and interested mobs. I […]

في ظلال الرجال#

اعتكفت بسنوات زواجي في رسم لوحة عائلة رسمت خطوط تفاصيلها بدقة وعناية بالغة حتى صرت أراها أمامي معلقة بحرفية تضفي على حياتي جمالا بالغا كالمقتنيات النادرة يتابعها المهتمون والمعجبون. كنت كالمتصوف زاهدة بما يملأ عيون البشر متأملة بتجليات تضفي للحياة معنى آخر أحاول الوصول إليه . أحاول الوصول إليه بلا عراك عقائدي أو فكري. حالة هروب […]

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